Paris, c'est pour la vie!

So I was gonna blog today and then I got to tired and then I started emailing people and realized how relaxing it was to type (weird) so I decided to blog after all.

I had a blast today all by myself with my music, and camera walking around Paris today!

First things first, I strongly advise you women against wearing any type of heels, even if they are the shorter/comfortable kind, if you are going any place that you might possibly get lost in.

That being said, I can continue on. Alright so a couple days ago I clarified on facebook that I was not getting deported. A lot of people assume that since I had issues with the law and I'm leaving the country, it automatically means that I am getting deported.

Hmmm...that's not quite how it works. For those of you who have kept up with my journey, I'm assuming you know how my situation played out. For those of you that are little blurry on the details,  well basically, I didn't get deported, I was accorded "Voluntary Departure" which basically means that I was asked to leave but I can come back as long as I have a valid Visa.
When people are deported, they are usually taken to jail first, and then once they are "kicked" out of the country, they are never allowed back. In some cases, they can come back after a certain period of time. None of that happened to me by the grace of God.

All of this to say that when granted the Voluntary Departure, I was given a document that I had to bring to the US Embassy in Paris to show that I had indeed departed the U.S territory and arrived where I told the government I would arrive.
So this morning, I had to drag my booty out of bed at 5am in order to take the Metro/RER to Paris. There's usually a really long line in front of the Embassy for visa requests(so many people wanna go there :p) so it's always smart to get there even before it opens in order to get a spot.

One of the girls I live with works as an English teacher in Paris, so I was able to ride a metro with her half of the way and then I was on my own for the rest of the day. YIKES.
I got to the Embassy and was #4 line. Which you're probably thinking...Great job!!! That's amazing! Well that's what I thought until I was told that for the document I had, I needed to come back two hours later..... 0__o
I was super grateful though because the guards were extremely friendly towards me. Not in a creepy way. Just genuinely felt bad for me and were simply nice. It always helps to have a smile on your face. One smile can go a long ways!

So I figure...why not start my rediscovering (since it wasn't my first time there) Paris now, at 7:40am (between walking to the metro station, taking a metro, getting a connecting train, and actually finding the embassy...i got there 1h30 after originally leaving the Duplex I live in).
So I asked around and found a little French Boulangerie (pastry shop/Cafe) and my server was super comical and sweet towards me. Then I got a little laughter with him and a couple that walked in to get baguettes and espressos. It was just a good environment to be in. Cheerful. Jolly. Relaxing. Etc....

It was my first time ordering anything here in France in over 5 years. So I didn't know what to ask for. Didn't know whether to leave a tip or not. Didn't know anything really. Which is so hard for me, because a lot of times I wonder if people think I'm an idiot when I ask such obvious questions, since my French is  pretty good. Most people simply assume I've always lived here and just have a "weird" (American---no offense to Americans, since I still love your style) sense of style. Same with when I first moved to the US. I didn't have any type of accent yet everything was so foreign to me and I asked many questions or would break many unwritten rules that I didn't know about, and people just viewed me as a "socially off" human being. I'm not complaining about being bilingual, I'm just saying it's got its cons to.

Well if I've learned something today is that, sometimes you just NEED to put your pride aside and simply ASK. I have that typical male mentality (I doubt any males read my blog, but if you do, I apologize for stereotyping) that hates asking for help. In fact, for reading my blog, I will reward your patience (cus I blabber a lot) and let you in on a little secret of mine. I am actually pretty insecure when it comes to my intellect. I don't think I'm intellectually smart. There ya have it. It's true. I know I'm smart in other ways, but not in this one, but because I am fast learner (I also forget fast lol), I love to observe and decide I can figure things out on my own.
I think that is where this male prideful mentality stems from. My intellectual insecurities lead me to pride which leads me to stubbornness.

Anyways, I've learned today that even though observing does help me learn, sometimes simply asking  will just save the prideful like myself from a migraine.

So here I am at this little Cafe. Loving life.

This was before the couple arrived. They ended up sitting on that green leather seat in front of me :)

I ordered my first real croissant in Forever, and I got a Cappuccino. After asking him many questions such as "Do I pay you when I'm done or do I leave it on the table? Is this a Cafe or pastry shop. Do you even make coffee here? Can I get a coffee to go? Does this place have restrooms? Can I have some change for the metro..." and snapping a few more pictures, I was on my way back to the US Embassy.

Back at the embassy all my guard buddies were still there and we were joking around and all and finally they let me in earlier than I was originally supposed to. I ended up waiting about 1h30 to get the document deposited, signed, and ended up getting a copy for myself. It all worked out!

While waiting around, I observed a ton. I may have creeped some out. Oh well. Didn't retain much information though. Since I wasn't necessarily interacting with anyone for the most part and wasn't fully awake yet. The one piece of info I retained however, will hopefully have a great affect on me. I was wowed by how freakin' stylish Europeans are. I've known it, but witnessing it is a whole other story! I got really inspired today. Which is good because my roomies are beginning to question my style more and more :/ lol

So apparently we are back to the 70s which makes sense. Right? ....

Here are examples of things I saw today

                                                 

Here's a link to more style inspiration for the winter.

http://www.tendances-de-mode.com/2011/04/15/2124-tendances-automne-hiver-2011-2012




After the embassy stuff got taken care of, I decided since I was already in Paris, why not explore. So I cranked my Ipod while listening to "Good Life" by One Republic and just went wandering around, minding my own business, and smiling at strangers. :) while taking pictures of course. (the sun had just come out at this point.)

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At one point, My ipod's battery was low and I needed the directions to get back to the place I live...so I decided to take a picture of them in case my Ipod did die. which it eventually did about 1h later.

So all in all, quite a fun day. I can't really say I met any particular individual or had any crazy conversations or adventures, but after spending a few hours in Paris, I realized I wasn't the only one who was out of place. I guess one would expect that, especially around the Eiffel Tower with all the tourists that travel miles and miles to see this somewhat imposing and awkwardly shaped tower; but I soon found out that even the French  didn't know their way around a lot of times. I can't tell you the amount of times that French people were asking me questions.
At one point a girl around my age asked me questions on my way home while using the RER and I confidently told her which train to take after double checking the map. She was so grateful that she bought me a chocolate bar. As soon as she hopped on that train, something in me didn't feel right and I looked at the signs that were behind me and realized the train she took was going the complete opposite way of her destination. I felt HORRIBLE. I wished I'd taken her phone number and could text her, but I still don't have a phone. So all I could do was pray that she somehow realized it and got off before it was to late. At that point, I realized that I was just as lost as she was. It wasn't till 2h30 later that I finally got home.... hence the advice on the heeled shoes!
Even after FINALLY getting to my destination, I unfortunately arrived at a completely different exit and could not find my way home.
Luckily, my bad experience of getting locked into a cemetery yesterday evening (at sundown) paid off. I  was able to locate various reference points and taller landmarks that helped me find my way back.

Yea yesterday evening my curiosity took the best of me. I wandered into a graveyard to take pictures of French coffins and such, and ended up staying in there far to long because on my way out, the gate I'd entered into was locked and no one was around. The sun was setting and though I was trying really hard not to panic, I couldn't help but feel my heart beating faster and faster as I took each step. Finally I caught eye of what seemed to be a narrow passage leading towards a separate part of the gate that had by chance been unlocked. I did have to squeeze through a few caskets to get through. Just writing about it is giving me the chills. I got out of there so fast!!! It was ridiculous. Plus I didn't have a phone, so Lord knows what could've happened otherwise. I dodged a bullet.

Well at least I think some of the pictures were worth it. I hope.

This is actually the first cemetary pic
I took. I wasn't planning on going in, but I just could
not help myself.

I really am grateful for these, they were my landmarks
that brought me back home today!

                                    

      




And because I don't like ending my blogs on scary morbid notes.......Here are is a quick summary of things I learned today. lol.

• Do not be afraid to ask
• In order to find yourself, you need to get lost first
• Smile. Even when you don't want to. You don't know where that smile can take you
• Europeans' style rock/back in the 70s
• Be friendly to strangers because you might need one someday yourself
• Don't ever wear heels if you think you'll get lost
• Life in France is expensive

And here are a few more pictures from my day that I'd like to share. I do plan on posting a LOT more on my facebook photography page soon! http://www.facebook.com/pages/Djolife-Photography/114008375351893

Thank you for joining me on my journey :) Please continue to pray for guidance.

PS: I get to possibly meet my niece for the first time tomorrow and spend some quality time with my sister in law and kiddos! Eeek!!!! :D

New chapter of my life

Dear Faithful Readers :)


This blog post shall be my 2nd one of the new year 2012, even though it will be the first one you will probably read. Confused?

Well let me explain. I typed up a blog entry on Jan 7th, 2012 while sitting at the airport waiting for my plane to arrive. The content of that entry was much more depressing than this one will be, I promise. I haven't had the opportunity to upload it yet because being in a "foreign" country means having to adapt to a lot of new things. As I am attempting to adapt to this new culture, so are my all of my electronic devices. They each need adaptors and well I haven't had the chance to purchase adaptors to plug in my laptop/camera/externel hardrive etc..

Do you see what I did there? :) Alright, that was super lame, sorry.

Thankfully, the room I'm in has a computer with wifi so I am able to get on here as often as I want to until my laptop is up and running again! I also have a phone in my room that can call the US for free :D
Both of these things come in quite handy when my jet lag is messing around with my head and the 6 hour difference doesn't allow me to connect as well as i'd like to with my American world.

So far so good. I haven't cried since my departure (definitely did before though), so either I'm still in denial, or all of your prayers have been heard; in which case I thank you.

The actual trip was surprisingly smooth. Got there on time, going thorugh security was a breeze (even though I had no liquids in any zip lock bags and have all of this jewelry on me). The flight itself felt long because I was sitting in between two ladies and could not get comfortable (I took sleeping pills hoping they would help me overlook that but they did not). We landed on time. I met an American girl at the airport and we embarked on a journey to find our luggage which was successfull for both of us! Hoping to meet up with her sometime soon! The people picking me up found me right away (i didnt know who to expect). Got in the car and they drove me straight over to my new neighborhood, home, and life.

I got to Alfortville (10min away from Paris) around 9:40, said hello to my new family (The Peraste family), they invited me to go to church service with them, I said sure, changed real quick and headed out to worship the Lord in French!!!

Service was good. Very different than what I've become used to but also quite similar in different and comforting ways.
It felt good to sing old French worship songs that I grew up singing at home in Senegal. It was also nice to see a few lovely familiar faces that I recognized from the last time I'd been here. I was "forced" to stand up and introduce myself, which I hate doing lol. But it is good for me to do things out of my comfort zone.

Though I've heard better sermons, I was so pleased to hear the Holy Spirit speaking directly to me  throughout the entire service! From the announcements all the way to the final prayer.

The sermon itself was about friendships (real tangible solid neverending friendhsips) and how God doesn't solely view us as His children but also as His friend.
The teacher used the example of being engaged to describe how our relationship with God should be. When two people love each other and get engaged  to each other, they take that time of engagement to really get to know each other. They are so excited about their futur together that they want to spend every second with each other to create a solid foundation for their lives. They constantly talk to each other, and they simply love being in each other's presence.
This should be how our relationship with the Lord is. Yet it's so easy to let other things come in the way of this fire and passion that comes and goes in and out of our daily lives.

Along the lines of frienships and closeness, he talked about the importance of friends. How friends are blessed from above and it is important to not only pray for your friends but also pray for your actual friendships. You know you love someone, when you pray for them, but you also know how much of a value a friend is to you when you begin to ask the Lord to really protect and nourish that friendship. While God uses friendships to challenge us, bless us, ans help us grow, the ennemy tries to tear them appart to keep us from being blessed and growing and being challenged.

This spoke straight to me because I feel as if for some unknown reason the Lord has always blessed me with meaningful friendships. Granted some were only meant to be in my life for a season and accepting that has been quite difficult at times, but either way, no matter where and when, I've been blessed with friends. Everytime I move again, I fear of losing some of these meaningful relationships, but this reminds me that through the distance and the time, if I put an effort  to pray for these friendships, God will continue to bless me with them.
and that was a beautiful reminder.

Another reason this sermon hit home was that secretly, I had decided that my new year's resolution would be to spend more intentional time praying for others once I got here. I say secretly because, year after year I have failed at keeping new year's resolutions, so even though I did make one in my heart, I didn't feel the need to announce it this time around.

Well here I go announcing it again. Maybe God wants me to announce it. Maybe not. Either way it's out and I have even come up with a way to challenge myself with this resolution. I plan on writing down the names of people I want to intentionally pray for and put them in a bowl from which I will pick a name out each day and not only pray for that person but also find a way (facebook, twitter, email, text, phonecall) to contact that person and see how they are doing.

This whole challenge sounds easy to do right now since I am not doing a whole lot but I am sure once work picks up, it will really become a challenge, which I hope you can keep me accountable to..somehow.

Speaking of work, I am sure you are all wondering what the plan is from here on out. Glad you asked. I actually REALLY need prayers on this topic.

I have the opportunity to work as a full time live in nanny in Switzerland for a family that would need me to start in February yet I am currently and actively searching for work here in France. I like the family I live with, I am fairly close to Paris and I can easily meet people and have random conversations with strangers (which I loooove to do) because I speak French (which I would not be able to do as easily in Zurich, since they speak German.) (ps typing on this French keyboard requires a lot of focus and attention!!!).

Here is how I feel right now. I feel as if I want to stay in France in the hopes of finding a job (anything really, it's been so long since I have worked that I am ready to work just about anywhere). The dilemna here is that along with staying here comes more of a chance of making new friends, getting nice and comfy in a completely new environment, loving where I am and eventually having to let go of all of that again and basically go through everything I just went through in my life.
If I were to nanny in Zurich, I would most likely get attached to the family but probably not go out much and the departure would be much easier I feel.

See, the problem is I have no idea how long God wants me here or wherever I am supposed to be so please please pray for guidance and peace in this wholde dilemna going on in my mind. I just want to go where God wants me to be. really that is the bottomline.

I think I've said more than enough for today. Thanks for reading :) BLESSINGS!!!

Dorina

ps pics from my last month in the US coming soon

Airport bloggin'

I am sitting here at the airport basically feeling like crap. I’m exhausted. I’m scared. I’m sad. I’m kind of frustrated at God and sitting next to a guy who smells horrible. I know most of these feelings will pass, but as of now, that is exactly how I feel and I’m not ashamed to express it.

I just said so many goodbyes (for the second time this year) and just parted ways with my best friend/the love of my life, Jeremy, and I do not understand why this needed to happen.

I know God is compassionate and has a reason for having me go through while having my best interest in mind. I also know there is a reason for  bringing me in and out of Huntington like He did. I’m currently trying to cope with the fact that he is taking me away from this place that He’s used to shape and mold me through so many experiences and people. I’m also attempting to be optimistic.

I have found things to look forward to as I head to France. Things such as French bread. Meeting my niece and seeing my bro, sis in law, and nephew again. Rekindling the flames of old friendships. Using my new camera to take pictures of a refreshingly new environment. Growing closer to the Lord. Meeting new people and having an impact on their lives while they impact mine. "Relearning" French. Not living out of suitcase anymore. The possibility of working again at last. And so much more.

I understand that God has a gréât plan for this life He’s given me, I just wish I could get a break sometimes and just settle down somewhere  for longer than just a few months, but then again this is not how the Lord created me. I am trying to find equilibrium though. A simple balance between my selfish human nature and embracing the way the Lord is able to use this human mess of mine and turn it into something glorious and beautiful. I selfishly just want to be with the people I love and live an easy, fun life. But God wants me to continue to grow while challenging me through these journeys.

And yet again everything in life is all bout the way that you look at it. I say this because so many people "envy" me for moving to France, and as I try to appreciate this new adventure, I am also attempting to hold on to the hope of not losing the people that are currently in my life, that I cherish so much through the, distance.

Perspectives are so interesting to me.

I bought a new camera about 2 weeks ago. A camera I’ve been wanting for years. Of course I wait till I’m the most broke to purchase it, but I love it. So excited about it. I’m still Learning a lot from it and hopefully will get comfortable with it enough to take legit photo shoots.

I went on a walk the day that I finally got it in the mail to play around with it. As I was snapping photos left and right, I eventually felt extremely discouraged. I wasn’t patient enough with it, and wasn’t understanding some of the settings. It’s one thing to have that eye for an great shot, but it’s a whole other thing to be able to become one with your camera and know the Relationship between all the settings so well that you don’t even have to think twice before knowing exactly what to do in order to get your photo to turn out exactly the way you want it to, leaving you with minimum amount of editing left to do to later.

I was standing in front of a gorgeous scenery, and yet still wasn’t able to capture anything to my liking. I finally sat down and just took a break from it all. I talked to God for a little bit. He told me to Be still and know that He is God and that He was right there.  I listened to Him some more, and out of nowhere the sun came out and led me to look at my scenery again, from a different angle. I was sitting down this time, and there it was. I don’t know how to explain it, but I grabbed my camera as this rush of creativity hit me and started shooting and got this :

Be Still and Know that I am God
Psalm 46:10

All I had to do was sit down, and look at my scenery from a different perspective to catch what I needed/wanted.

Life is like looking through the lens of a camera, if you shift your angle view or perspective, you can see life in a completely different light.

I am trying to look at this adventure from a different angle. Not from the grumpy, sad, hopeless angle of my missing my friends and having to leave my comfortable lifestyle behind ; but instead looking at it from the angle of everyone else who seems so envious of my new journey in France, or wherever the Lord ends up taking me.

As of now, I do not have any plans in case you were all wondering. I am staying with family friends to start out and will look for work in Paris, while keeping an eye out for nannying opportunities in other countries.

As far as Jeremy is concerned, we are viewing this long distance as an opportunity to strenghthen our Relationship in a way that we can learn to better communicate with each other while continuing to learn from each other.

For those of you who know him, you know what a Bright light he is to whomever he comes in contact with. I pray and hope that this light continues to affect many more people in the midst of this sad chapter in our lives. I miss him so much already. We parted teary eyed and hopeful. Please keep us in your prayers.

May the Lord bless each and every one of you and I trust that you will have an excellent new year 2012 !

Blessings,

Do