A Black woman’s haïr is unfairly hard to take care of. I do have a point to this, believe it or not. It might be a stretch but just bare with me here and if anything, you might get an education on "Black Culture" :)
I got this from an article, which will shed light on where I am going with this :
"Very tight braiding or weaving is linked to a permanent type of hair loss that affects many African American women, new research suggests.
While the findings can't prove hair grooming is at the root of the problem, women might still want to take them into consideration, said Dr. Angela Kyei, who worked on the study.
"I won't tell you not to braid your hair, but I don't want you to braid it so tightly that you need to take pain medication," said Kyei, of the Cleveland Clinic in Ohio.
Prolonged pulling at the hair strands may cause inflammation of the hair follicle, which has been shown to lead to scarring. In principle, that could lead to a type of balding that dermatologists call central centrifugal cicatricial alopecia, or scarring hair loss.
This type of balding starts at the top of the scalp and slowly spreads to the rest. It occurs only in black women. Because there is no treatment for it, Kyei decided to try to find out what is causing it instead.
Observations from the 1960s had hinted it was related to hot-comb straightening, but little research has looked at other explanations."
(If you want more on this: here is the article http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/42541362/ns/health-skin_and_beauty/t/black-womens-hair-loss-tied-braiding-weaving/)
Here is a tid bit on what I (should) go through on a day to day basis.
When I don’t get my haïr braided, I have to take care of it myself, which is almost as painful and time consuming as getting it braided.
My hair is so hard to handle, that I prefer cutting it. In order to cut it and keep it "cute" or as some may say "presentable" I need money to maintain short hair. So that option goes down the drain real fast (especially considering the situation I’m in ).
So when I do decide to finally handle my type of haïr, I start out by washing it with what should be spécial shampoo, but I settle with regular shampoo that I can afford, and then I have to put all sorts of oils and creams in it to keep it healthy, then after that I Blow dry it strand by strand using a round haïr brush. Once that is done, I go strand by strand again over it with a haïr straightener and then I apply a little more haïr cream bécause all of that heat can break off and damage my haïr just like that.
Once that is done and I feel fresh and good, I refuse to tie my haïr because once I tie it in any shape or form, it remains in that shape or form, and in order to put it down again, I have to straighten it all over again. I also avoid wetting it at all costs otherwise it frizzes up and I have to restart the procèss all over again !
Also, at night, I am supposed (I rarely do this) to bobby pin my haïr and cover it with a spécial night haïr cover so that the next day it can look similar to the way it did the day before. I have to consistently keep it creamed and healthy otherwise it just breaks off.
Another thing that you need to understand is that growing up, I grew up around a culture that taught me that my haïr is my beauty. If I am dressed up, have makeup on, and fine looking jewelry but my haïr doesn’t look good, then I don’t look good. Period.
This is a small insight on what goes on in a black woman’s mind when she puts so much care into her haïr.
Now, I will confess that I rarely take care of my haïr the way I just described it. In fact, I can’t remember the last time I actually did all of those things consecutively as I just explained the process. But most black women really do do that and MORE in order to maintain their hair. Why? Because it's worth it :)
Last week I decided I was tired of doing this and wanted braids again. Living in Huntington, however, brings quite a challenge to this wish becoming an actuality. It is so hard to find a person who can braid.
I was fortunate enough to meet a random girl named Melissa, who Works at Pizza Hut and started talking to me about haïr. I proceeded to ask her if she knew how to braid. To my surprise (my being stereotypical and forgetting that white girls can also braid) she knew how to do weaves, extensions, corn rows, designs, singles, etc…
I got so excited that I asked for her number and figured I might as well try her out.
She seemed really sweet and had just moved hère so I figured…why not…if anything, I can use this as an opportunity to minister to her and/or just provide her with a new group of friends :)
We arranged a date, and she braided my haïr. Corn rows with extensions and designs. I was so excited, I couldn’t contain myself !
I underestimated her because before starting I told her not to be afraid to braid as tightly as she can. If you read the part of the article that talks about tight braids and didn’t understand the point, basically we want our braids to be tight so that they will last. We grow up hearing that "beauty is pain" for this particular reason. The process's time varies depending on the braider/the technique/the hair style/extensions or no extensions. I've sat down for about 10 hours straight before. This time it took about 4 hours, which isn't to bad.
She braided my haïr SO tight that not only did it hurt during the process (the type of pain that makes you feel sick to your stomach), but it also hurt consistently for 5 consecutive days. My scalp has scabs, and I'm pretty sure when I do take these braids out, some of my hair will be broken off due to the tightness.
Bless Melissa’s heart, she only did what I asked her to do. She was as sweet, if not sweeter than I had expected her to be. She was a joy to be around. In fact, once she left, one of my roommates, Kayla, said "Oh man, I like her more than cake !" :) And I absolutely agree. I hope to see her some more!!
So no hard feelings whatsoever, but I do share this story to express my empathizing with the article I shared with you earlier.
If you are wondering where I am going with this…Here it is.
I’ve been able to relate more and more with Christ lately. I can’t say that I will ever EVER understand what Christ went through when He literally walked towards His death so that I could be saved and find life through Him, but I will say that just as He knew what the pain He was going through was leading towards, I also know the pain, confusion, heartache, darkness, frustrations, lack of patience, and whatever else I may sometimes go through does in fact lead to something beautiful and completely Worth it.
No, I am not comparing Christ’s pain with the pain that I go through in order to take care of my haïr and end up looking pretty. lol. That was just a very feeble and poor example of what life can be like. Life as a Christian especially.
Man, my heart goes out to people who go through life’s challenges without a single hope to hold on to. I can’t even imagine how these people continue on in life.
I have been living out of suitcases with no stable home for exactly a year now. Let me tell you that this journey has not been easy. I have been unemployed for almost 8 months now. I have been living off of what God literally provides me with day by day through friends, family, and loved ones. I have gone from being forced to leave the country to being forced to stay in the country while not being allowed to work in one night. I’ve been waiting on the American government to decide my fate for me for 5 months.
I PRAISE GOD for that. I’ve gone through all sorts of painful émotions. I’ve also Fallen in love in the midst of it. I’ve seen the light. I’ve been blessed beyond imagination. I’ve still been able to live out my passions in life. I’ve been exhausted and felt hopeless while other times being lifted up by God Himself. I’ve latched out on people that are closest to me.
I mean the list goes on. I can’t express to you the past couple months of my life. The absolute rollercoaster.
I also can’t express to you that consistent love and strength that’s been by my side reminding me that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. That there is joy in every single day. That there is pure delight and beauty in the midst of the people that I encounter day after day.
I could list every single name of the people that have just blessed me during these past couple of months but the list would be TO long for God has placed SO many people on my path during this journey in order for me to keep my eyes focused on what is ahead…HIM. The cross. The prize. The rainbow after the Storm.
" I still believe in the Sun even when it doesn’t shine.
I still believe in love even when I am alone.
I still believe in God, even when He is sillent.
Trust God in the dark until light returns ."
Today, I finally received a letter from Immigration. I have a court date on Sept 21rst in Detroit, Michigan.
Today I also received an e-mail from a photography studio that I had contacted in case they simply needed a volunteer. Since my situation seemed confusing to them, the manager made it clear that they might not be able to use me even though I was only seeking to volunteer. After 2 months of silence, they contact me to ask if I am still interested in helping out. On the same day that I find out about my court date.
Also on the same day that my boyfriend, Jeremy, who has been fervently searching for a job for about 4 months straight, finally gets one definite positive answer and another very strong possibility to work elsewhere.
Who ever said God doesn’t work when He is "silent" !?
I know I originally went off on what seemed like a tangent with my "éducation on Black Women’s haïr" and I did warn you that it would be a STRETCH ehe BUT I hope you now see my point through my very weak attempt at expressing how I feel when it comes to living solely for God. Being Faithful through Sacrifice, pain, patience, and service usually leads to a light at the end of the tunnel. Just as Christ did. And even if it doesn’t lead to a bright light (cus it didn't really lead there for Christ. not right away at least). we have Eternity with the Lord to look forward to.
It is a long journey, a journey that depending on the situation may seem to take FOREVER, but we can make it by holding on to God and giving Him the little strength we have left and count on Him to pull us with ALL the strength that He has. It’s called persévérance through faith, and it’s something beautiful.
The sun is now rising. I will rest my head and prepare for a brand new beautiful day.
